February, the
month of love, but much as I like the idea, I cannot benefit from it as I’m
still a single pringle. I have had two relationships in the past, the one last
was a mutual break up so I hold no grudges against that guy, but the first guy
however… I’ll let this poem explain as I wrote it not too long after that break
up:
Last
Word
For so long
chains had bound me,
The world
only black and beige,
Where I could
only wonder,
What lied
beyond this cage?
But then my
saving grace came,
I found the
strength to fight,
I saw the
freedom before me,
So I pulled
with all my might.
The chains
are broken,
Freedom calls
me at last,
Colour floods
my prison,
Burying it in
the past.
No cages are
in my life now,
No one to
hold me back,
Sometimes you
will try again,
But your
control is too lack.
I will prove
myself to the world,
That no one
can hold me down,
Though you
may think I cannot cope,
And without
you I would drown.
Say what you
want I don’t care,
I don’t need
you anymore,
You’ve
suppressed me for far too long,
From now on
it’s my lore.
You’ve had
your chance,
You blew it
really bad,
And one day
you will see,
I was the
best you had.
For one day
you’ll see,
I’ll will
leave my mark on this earth,
Stronger and
better without you,
You will see
my every worth.
I refuse to
act desperate, being desperate, in my eyes, is a sure-fire way to be taken
advantage of and I think that’s why my first relationship was a flop. I was
just so happy to finally be in a relationship that I failed to see any of the
red flags that were so obvious such as demining comments on my looks,
aggressive behavior when playing video games (I am not blaming the video games,
I’m a gamer myself and I pretty calm when playing)and lack of ambition. There’s
so much more but I only have 500 words to work with here.
At the time,
I had nothing to compare it to, so I struggled with nearly seven years to make
it work and in the end, it fizzled out and what was worse, he found a
girlfriend less than a month later. It wasn’t so much that I missed him it was
more like it made me feel worthless, nearly 7 years together and I was replaced
in a month? It hurt but it taught me a lesson, that I could do so much better
than him.
I will one
day find my soulmate but good things come to those who wait… I just hope it
happens before I turn 35.
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